Inhabit

Inhabit

This flesh contains me

The me bursting within

I inhabit a space 

Not of my making

Limbs and bones

Grown together by plan

I’ve made it my own

Incomparable to others

Think of it as my will

Running freely across time 

Centred within a universe

Which could crumble at anytime

Which breaks, builds, and burns

All at once, for however long, for ever 

Fear

Fear

For as long as I live

There will always be something with me

A gift from my parents

That I would never return

Why they each time I faltered

Give me this gift of fear

I hope it was to protect me

But I know it wasn’t the case

They wanted to keep me small

Safe within the lens of their glaze

I’ve seen the smallness in my sister

I’ve seen the smallnes in my brother

The fear to go outside themselves

The fear to be what my parents needed 

That would never work on me

And I lived with the consequences 

But the point I’ve missed, forgotten, and stumbled upon time and time again

I’ve lived my life despite the fear

Resting in the back of my mind

I’ve lived my life no matter what

And I cannot live life any other way

Blood rushing through

Blood rushing through

Believe me

This was always the plan

To dwell in this place

Gather my thoughts

Gain and lose so many people 

For this beautiful moment

Believe me

It has all been worth it

The confusion echoed in everyone’s eyes

The reflections of disbelief staring into void

Every piece of me knows it now

For this beautiful moment

Where everything is still

Not a word is spoken

Everything is at peace

Every part of me is at peace

Obessive 

Obessive 

For however long 

I’ve become the person

I am today

I’ve never lacked for time

Things always got done

There was always enough hours in a day
How can I do all that I need to in 24 hours?

People would say with a tone which always made me defensive

Is it I didn’t do enough?

Is it I finished to quickly?

Or did I never put stock

In all the little details 

On the endless lists people construct

I wanna live

I wanna live

I wanna live

With extensions of myself

The family I’ve never had

People not just connected by blood

But though ideas and drive

To often then not

I’ve lived with people

And it’s fallen apart along the way

I wanna live with people

Where we are extensions of ourselves